I have been in Desire since my divorce 15 years ago. My Desire has been around creating conscious relationships with Self & Other.
I was emotionally severed from my partner; so lonely, so tired, so flat in my daily existence with him that it felt like I was literally dying a slow death.
Today my desire is ongoing, an unfulfilled quest. Some would say,
“Poor dear, can’t find her true love, if only…who can we find for her...hmm maybe she needs therapy…”
Look into the window of my soul, there is no sorry me, there is only a woman filled with a burning desire that will never allow her to abandon Self, her knowing of Self, her truth.
Knowing her ignites Desire. She wakes my wildish knowing, my aching heart is aching with Desire.
I slog through rivers of mud, fire swept forests, heavens hurling stones that pelt my bruising muscle, but I don’t stop, yearning for the One, the One who will meet me. Never will I retreat from my heart’s Desire.
It burns hotter than everything before…the carnage left in the wake of a broken heart.
If I am to have true love, then he will never sit in complacency, a dead walker, that only sees himself. No, not that-
I prefer to jam in love songs of dreaming, dance and howl under full moons of longing, revel in sun-soaked aching, sear with Desire until I am charred ash from this glorious longing.
Imagining, dreaming even with all its suffering, the loneliness it sometimes brings, the wickedness it drops in before a night’s dream…
And, in the awakening I feel so alive in my visceral Desire of knowing true love. I am true love.
I will take Desire with me until I am dust, and my wildish soul flies with desire on her back, reminding her she never lived small.
The truth is in the Desire of unrequited love, I am the venerated love of this lifetime.
Always, more to be revealed…
Love & Gratitude,